A couple of BYU entrepreneurs asked me for advice on a company they
wanted to launch. Kind of a Dollar Shave Club for frequent travelers
plagued with skid marks in their shorts. It took me about 30 seconds to
arrive at an available URL: ButtValet.com. You should check out their
Facebook site, which they launched yesterday. And another 30 seconds to
come up with the verbiage on the back of their individual ButtValet
packets: Give these away on the airplane and land yourself a free
month's supply with every referral. Talk about viral marketing, heh heh.
I remembered several trips where I really could have used
individually wrapped butt wipes to spare myself some serious discomfort.
Truly. When I travel for 3 days, I pack 3 sets of shorts. Skid marks on
one mean either wearing them for the rest of the day, or, eh, going
commando. Once, at a Safeguard Scientifics advisory board meeting in
Atlantic City, I rather badly defiled my shorts. Something about the
food there? At a group dinner that night, several of my table mates
started sniffing the source of the poo smell at the table. I pretended
to sniff, myself. We never did discover the culprit, although several
heads nodded when one fellow left the table. He was a start-up
presenting to the group, hoping to get VC funding. Someone commented
that he must have gotten too nervous. We all laughed.
I once had a buddy who had the middle seat on a transcontinental
airline flight. He, well, "sharted" himself and did a rather poor job of
rinsing out his shorts in the airline lavatory. His seat turned into
the seventh level of hell for the people to either side of him.
If you're a frequent traveler, $8 per month will solve a lot of problems.
And if you're one of my CEO buddies, Spencer and Chance (my two BYU
buddies) will make your company a swell deal supplying your corporate
restrooms with a monthly supply of ButtValet.com pre-packaged wipes. Not
only will your employees thank you, but your Monday morning staff
meetings will, ah…go a lot more smoothly.
Check out
ButtValet.com to see a cute movie they did. The boys didn't
like the script I wrote for them. I even bet them my stock position in
their company, double or nothing, that my script would out pull their by
100-to-1. But those of you familiar with my guerrilla warfare style can
probably guess my script offended the sensibilities of young idealists.
So take a peek at the movie, and their website. And if you sign up
for ButtValet monthly deliveries, be sure to write RICK BENNETT as the
referring source. You'll get infinite satisfaction as you travel, and
I'll get a lifetime supply of wipes for myself. Of course, I don't
travel. I get to sit here in "The Pirate Cottage" and come up with
outrageous marketing ideas for my high-tech clients. Thank Heaven for
GoToMeeting and the Internet.
Selah.