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Thursday, March 26, 2020

The day I refused to sell actor Robert Conrad my invention


Back in the late 1970s, I proved that a mathematician could become an electronic engineer by learning Ohm's Law: V=IR. I invented the Hagoth voice stress analizer. One day I got a call from Robert Conrad, star of the TV show Black Sheep Squadron. He wanted to buy one, but I refused to sell it to him. He was a feisty guy, former Golden Gloves boxing champion, and got a little hot under the collar. Then I explained that his first TV show, Wild Wild West, inspired my invention. All those cool things he pulled out the heel of his cowboy boot intrigued me. So I told him that since he was the inspiration for my invention, I'd be delighted to give him one. I'd even fly down to the Black Sheep Squadron set and show him how to use it.

What a guy! He said, "Thank you. What can I do for you?" To which I replied that I'd love him to narrate the introduction cassette tape I sent out with each unit. He quickly agreed and I flew to California.

He'd shoot a scene and then come into his on-set motor home and narrate a few paragraphs. Then he'd go shoot another scene. After about half a day of this, he stopped in the middle of our recording session and said, "Do you know how much Eveready batery paid me to shoot their commercial, daring someone to knock that battery off my shoulder?" I said I didn't know, and he exclaimed, $560,000! They payid me $560,000 for that commercial, and I've spent half a day working for you and all I'm getting is this $1600 gadget!"

I laughed and said, "Cool, huh?"

He laughed, too. And finished the recording.

#robertconrad #blacksheepsquadron #wildwildwest

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Implementation suggestions for THE MORGAN DOCTRINE are most welcome. What are the "Got'chas!"? What questions would some future Cyber Privateering Czar have to answer about this in a Senate confirmation hearing?